You Are More Than What You Give: Undoing the Lie of Earned Belonging

You’re the one who remembers.
The one who says yes.
The one who carries the extra weight without being asked.

People call you generous. Reliable. Selfless.
But they don’t always see the cost.

Because underneath the service… there’s a question that hurts to ask:
If I’m not needed, do I still matter?

This lie often grows in childhood—
where praise came only when you were helpful,
where your needs took a backseat,
where being “low-maintenance” became your survival strategy.

So you became the dependable one.
The giver. The silent strong.
Loved for what you do, not who you are.

But let this sink in:
You don’t have to earn your place through usefulness.

You matter even when you’re not producing.
You are allowed to rest.
You are allowed to need.
You are allowed to be seen apart from your service.

Ask yourself:

• Who taught me that usefulness equals love?
  

• What would it feel like to be wanted—not for what I offer, but simply for who I am?
  

• What’s the fear underneath my over-functioning?

You are not a role.
You are a person.
And you already belong.

For more, check out my new book: 50 Lies to Unbelieve - Reclaim the Truth of Your Irrevocable Worth.